coming to the “Free Philly Fringe” September 2021
“Friend, No one’s Funding This”
“Somehow performing is a part of me…pushing it out onto the market is killing my spirit all the while… and yet it is my spirit all the while”
This gathering among F/friends examines questions around burnout and what it means to be an artist. Drawing on Quaker values we ask how to build an art practice in peace. How can we make an art practice that isn't damaging to ourselves?
Stimulus introduced by Rogue Theology artists Julia Brandenberger and Tyler Blaetz, performed by all
PAST SHOWINGS:
Upper Dublin Monthly Meeting, Ambler Pennsylvania, June 18th 2021, Philadelphia SoLow Festival
coming to PHILLY FREE FRINGE SEPT 2021
DRAWING ON
the collective wisdom of the meeting, we created the following poem which was used in the performance.
Contributions from Friends are italicized. These sentences are paraphrased versions of the what was said during the initial Worship Sharing (a Quaker process) that opened the piece.
The Queries for the Worship Sharing are as follows:
How do you stick to what you believe in in the absence of other’s support/enthusiasm?
Where do you source the strength to keep going when it feels like you’re on your own?
When you aren’t "succeeding", and doubting whether you should continue, how do you stay true to yourself?
There is a refrain that is repeated at the end of each verse. The poem was spoken by Tyler Blaetz and the refrain repeated by Julia, who accompanied with poem with a dance incorporating the meetinghouse architecture and land around it.
………………………………………………….
Long
are the arms of the shadow, in the arms of the race
it grabs your waist
gives you reason to claw
gives you claws of your own
Gives you fear as a premise of status and place
but the Friend says
When Icarus & Details are banished they craft their wings & fly away. We remember the fate of Icarus, but forget the second half of the father’s message: Do not Fly too low.
Boom, to save its’ life
JULIA: “to save my life”
Long
are the arms of The Shadow, in the arms of the race
It seals your place
tears you as you as try to get away
tears, as you cry to get away
floodlights, on the stains from the fight
With a speaker it bites as it booms and it judges
“With some might, you would stay”
But the Friend says
When my career brings not fame or fortune, but FUN. In the absence of an audience to please, I find inside what drew me here to begin with. Through the eternal darkness, fear and insecurity, I keep in mind to not create my own demons before they show up.
Boom, to save its’ life
JULIA: “to save my life”
Long
are the arms of the shadow in the arms of the race
it grabs your face
nothing …….
The nothing looks at you
and you, you look at nothing......
But the Friend says
When I’m a performer, I feel the lack of having a physical body of work. I feel the burn that once the show is over, the work is gone. But to me, it is the only thing I know, the only thing that makes sense to me. We make from our hearts - that has to be enough.
Boom, to save its’ life
JULIA: “to save my life”
Wrong
are the arms of the ladder
up the wall of the race
it has no Grace
demands you to bow
“belly up” like a cow and munch and march to its own selfish pace
But the friend says
I question: How do we define success? Even if there are only a few present, I remember they came to see ME, to be engaged & entertained. I do my work to engage the very people in front of me, and who is more important than they? Consider the numbers as secondary. Whether the moment is intimate or massive, to live in that moment as it is.
Boom, to save its’ life
JULIA: “TO SAVE MY LIFE”
Wrong
are the arms of the ladder up the wall of the race
it numbs your taste
makes goo of morality
laws of totality
over and over the rub starts to chafe
But the Friend says
I remember the story of Maria Gimbutas, and that she was eventually vindicated, appreciated, understood, because her work was ultimately valuable and she continued with it despite the lack of enthusiasm from others. Because she knew in herself it was valuable.
I declare the falsehood of the notion that “if my work was good it would gain people’s attention and enthusiasm”. My work is worthwhile because I know it is good enough.
Boom, to save its’ life
JULIA: “TO SAVE MY LIFE”
Wrong
are the arms of the
Long are the arms of the
Wrong are the arms of the
Rungs
Of the rungs of the hands
Of the hands on the waist
Of the waste of the waste
Of the hands of the friend
Of the friend of the hands
Of the hands of the one
Of the rungs of the Sun
Of the rings on the ground
Of the friends in the rings
In the rings in the air
In the air at the space
Between Friends who do care
In the space between Friends who share
To save its’ life
To save thy life
To save my life
..... Boom