Works by Julian Ormandy
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Writing

To Save Its' Life

The following piece was constructed partly ahead of time by Julian and partly with the help of F/friends who took part in the worship sharing of “Friend, No One’s Funding This” at Upper Dublin Monthly Meeting on June 18th 2021.

Contributions from Friends are italicized. These sentences are paraphrased versions of the what was said during the initial worship sharing that opened the piece.

There is a refrain that is repeated at the end of each verse. The poem was spoken by Tyler Blaetz and the refrain repeated by Julian, who accompanied with poem with a dance incorporating the meetinghouse architecture and land around it.

LONG

are the arms of the shadow, in the arms of the race 

it grabs your waist 

gives you reason to claw

gives you claws of your own

Gives you fear as a premise of status and place

but the Friend says

 When Icarus & Details are banished they craft their wings & fly away. We remember the fate of Icarus, but forget the second half of the father’s message: Do not Fly too low.

 Boom, to save its’ life

JULIAN: “to save my life”

 

LONG

are the arms of The Shadow, in the arms of the race

It seals your place 

tears you as you as try to get away 

tears, as you cry to get away

floodlights, on the stains from the fight

With a speaker it bites as it booms and it judges

“With some might, you would stay”

But the Friend says

When my career brings not fame or fortune, but FUN. In the absence of an audience to please, I find inside what drew me here to begin with. Through the eternal darkness, fear and insecurity, I keep in mind to not create my own demons before they show up. 

Boom, to save its’ life

JULIAN: “to save my life” 

 

LONG

are the arms of the shadow in the arms of the race 

it grabs your face 

nothing …….

The nothing looks at you

and you, you look at nothing......

But the Friend says

 When I’m a performer, I feel the lack of having a physical body of work. I feel the burn that once the show is over, the work is gone. But to me, it is the only thing I know, the only thing that makes sense to me. We make from our hearts - that has to be enough.

 Boom, to save its’ life

JULIAN: “to save my life” 

 

WRONG

are the arms of the ladder

up the wall of the race 

it has no Grace 

demands you to bow 

“belly up” like a cow and munch and march to its own selfish pace

But the friend says

 I question: How do we define success? Even if there are only a few present, I remember they came to see ME, to be engaged & entertained. I do my work to engage the very people in front of me, and who is more important than they? Consider the numbers as secondary. Whether the moment is intimate or massive, to live in that moment as it is. 

Boom, to save its’ life

JULIAN: “TO SAVE MY LIFE”

 

WRONG

are the arms of the ladder up the wall of the race 

it numbs your taste 

makes goo of morality 

laws of totality 

over and over the rub starts to chafe

But the Friend says

I remember the story of Maria Gimbutas, and that she was eventually vindicated, appreciated, understood, because her work was ultimately valuable and she continued with it despite the lack of enthusiasm from others. Because she knew in herself it was valuable.

I declare the falsehood of the notion that “if my work was good it would gain people’s attention and enthusiasm”. My work is worthwhile because I know it is good enough.

 Boom, to save its’ life

JULIAN: “TO SAVE MY LIFE” 

 

WRONG

are the arms of the

Long are the arms of the

Wrong are the arms of the

Rungs

Of the rungs of the hands

Of the hands on the waist

Of the waste of the waste

Of the hands of the friend

Of the friend of the hands

Of the hands of the one

Of the rungs of the Sun

Of the rings on the ground

Of the friends in the rings

In the rings in the air

In the air at the space

Between Friends who do care

In the space between Friends who share

To save its’ life

To save thy life

To save my life

..... Boom


Julia Brandenberger